Friday, February 16, 2018

Pregnancies and weight loss

Yesterday I was looking back at my posts from when I was pregnant with Mushy and Big T.
If you don't know my story, I was 50 lbs. overweight BEFORE I got pregnant with my first, Big T, in 2009.
I started pre-pregnancy at 185 lbs. At 5'6, that was about 50 lbs. more than my "normal".
I was newly married and had just steadily put on about 10 lbs. a year. A healthy lifestyle wasn't something I was ever taught. It's not ever something I had to worry about. I was a very active kid and played competitive sports for a very long time. So my diet consisted of fast food, fried chicken, sweet tea, and pretty much anything I wanted.
I never gained weight because I was so active. I practiced 2 hours a day, sometimes more, and softball and volleyball were my life.

Oh, if I'd have known THEN what I know NOW. I would have dialed in my nutrition, I would have fed my body to PERFORM, and not just to survive.
But I feel like a healthy lifestyle wasn't a big thing back then. No one I knew really did anything any differently than I did.
A bag of chips and a Coke for lunch was normal.

So it's no wonder that I had weight issues the older and less active I became.

When I had Big T I weighed 220 lbs.
And I felt EVERY BIT OF IT.
It's not that I gained a lot during my pregnancy, 35 lbs. is still considered normal, but I was 50 lbs. overweight to begin with.
Everything hurt.
I hit the miserable mark at 25 weeks.
I still wasn't accustomed to a healthy lifestyle at that point.

32 weeks with Big T- 2009
I didn't workout, I didn't eat healthy, none of that was on my radar yet.

So after I had him, I decided I needed to lose 60 lbs.
198 lbs. was my starting point.
And there's a very long, detailed story that went into that weight loss, but I did it in 11 months.
I posted progress pictures on my old blog with every 10 lbs. I lost.
198 lbs. - post baby #1 - 2009
138 lbs. - post baby #1 - 2010 (11 months later)
198 lbs. - post baby #1 - 2009
138 lbs. - post baby #1 - 2010

Health was now a part of my life.
That weight loss was what catapulted my life to the next chapter. It changed absolutely EVERYTHING for me.
It opened up a new career path, deep seeded issues in my marriage, my goals, dreams, EVERYTHING.
Some of it good, some of it the scariest thing I've ever been through, but ALL OF IT, lead to the most amazing things.

In 2011 my HATT (Husband At The Time) and I decided that we were ready to have baby #2.

This pregnancy was MUCH better than my first.
I gained 32 lbs. with him and I stayed active with him throughout the duration of my pregnancy.

Now, my "active" THEN, ISN'T my "active" now.
Let me say this, as with EVERYTHING, weight loss is a PROCESS. Fitness is a PROCESS.
It takes TIME to get into these things, and it certainly took time for me as well.
My "active" with my pregnancy #2 was running/jogging a few times a week.
It's pretty much all I did.
And HEY, it was great! That's just where I was at that time in 2011.
I didn't lift weights, I didn't take spin classes, I didn't do anything but what I could afford, which was pretty much nothing but running.
I was also brand new to a healthy lifestyle, so my version of "healthy" eating was also very different.
It was BETTER than before, but it wasn't what I'd eat NOW, after having lived a healthy lifestyle for 8+ years and gaining the knowledge I have now (which I'm sure will be even more so in the next 8 years!)

I hope that makes sense.

I did the best I could with the knowledge and funds I had at that time.

Baby #2 - 2011

After I had Mushy, I began the weight loss process again. This time was much more manageable. I felt like I'd just been through it, and losing the 30 lbs. I needed wasn't too intimidating.
Post baby #2 - 2011 - 171 lbs.

Post baby #2 -2012- 140 lbs. 

Post baby #2 - 2011 - 171 lbs. 

Post baby #2 - 2012- 140 lbs. 
After I lost the baby weight with Mushy, I began to get into other things like weight lifting and spinning.

In 2014 I got divorced, moved in with my parents with the boys and competed in my first bikini competition.




That was a very difficult time in my life.
I was being scrutinized more than I ever had, I was being judged, literally, and I was trying to figure out who the hell I was.
I searched for happiness in a pant size, which I was in a size 2 by the way, the smallest I'd EVER been.
EVER.

One thing I learned from that experience, was a love for the sport. I learned that there's a give and take. I learned that without a support system, it will BREAK YOU DOWN.
I learned that who you surround yourself with is so incredibly vital, something I had been blind to in the past.
But most importantly, I learned how freaking strong I was.
Not physically, but MENTALLY.
I'd never been beaten down so much in my life. And the way I collected myself after that and vowed to move on and NEVER take that again, is something I'm so very proud of.

I started my life completely over.

I found a happy medium.
A place where macros don't control me and I workout to FEEL GOOD.
A place where a number on a scale didn't make or break my mood.
2015 - around 140-145 lbs. Not weighing myself regularly.

I lived in that place for a long time- happy.
I'm STILL happy.

I'm just growing another human and happy. :)

This pregnancy has been the easiest of the 3, thus far.
I have stayed extremely active and eaten pretty healthy.
Both very relative terms, by the way.
But I am spinning 4-5 times a week, lifting 2-3 times a week, and getting in walks and runs still.
I have gained 24 lbs. thus far and I have 9 weeks left.

I have not gotten remarried yet, but that is in our plans.
This baby was a surprise, but it doesn't make us any less grateful for him.
We didn't want to take away the fun and excitement of a wedding just because we got pregnant.
So we are taking things one big life step at a time. :)
First was to purchase our own home.
My DREAM since getting divorced. We did that in November of 2017.

I am just plugging along with this pregnancy and am so incredibly excited to meet this little man and see the boys with him.
30 weeks with baby #3
I will definitely be sharing my post baby #3 weight loss on the blog after he is born. :)
And this time will be a liiiiittle different, so stay tuned!
It's going to be AWESOME.... .and very humbling I'm sure. :)