Pay it Forward- Kayla

This is Kayla's story. 

Location: Saint Joseph, MN

"I am a professor in Minnesota and I'd like to nominate my student, Kayla, who is a senior in college this year. 

I've had Kayla in class a few times now and also have gotten to know her because I've been helping her through the application process to graduate school.  Kayla is hard-working and does well in classes.  When she was first in my class, I would always hear her talking with her group about how she worked 3 jobs-- I couldn't believe it! I During the class, her group mates always ranked her high for participation, so I know that in addition to those 3 jobs, she was able to time manage enough to do her part in the group.  I thought that spoke so highly of her work ethic. 

This year, I've learned why Kayla has had to work 2-3 jobs simultaneously while being a full-time college student. Kayla's mother has been an alcoholic her entire life and during her sophomore year of college, kicked her out of her house.  That same year, Kayla's father was diagnosed with cancer.  Kayla worked with the state to be identified as a "self-supporting" student, which probably helped her to receive more financial aid.  But Kayla has used her money from her jobs not only to pay her tuition, books, and living expenses without much help, but she also was sending money to her dad to help him afford treatment and expenses!  

Kayla never asks for anything, never complains, and never asks for pity.  Her family does not value education and she has overcome so much to get where she is. She is one of the strongest people I have ever met. 

Kayla loves doing lab work and research, she is applying to Nutritional Science PhD programs in warmer climates (I don't blame her, its cold here!). 

Kayla also has POTS syndrome (chronically low blood volume) which stems from a heart defect.  

While she doesn't need treatment now for this, I feel like she also needs this money because she needs to feel secure in going to see a doctor-- she told me she often puts it off because of cost.  A few weeks ago she was coughing up blood and went to the ER after putting it off.  I want her to have this money so that she goes in for care right away instead of letting it get bad!  

This syndrome also limits how many hours she can work. 

This week, Kayla and I've been finalizing some of her applications to graduate programs -- typically students apply to between 4-7 and each application is about $50.  Today, Kayla said to me, "I need to wait to apply to some of these schools because the applications are so expensive, I can't afford to eat".  

This wrecked me.  

I know I can help her short-term with some of these items, but I immediately thought of your pay-it-forward initiative.  I found this so ironic as well because I am doing a research study on food insecurity in college students, through my research I've come to realize that many people assume because students in college are paying tuition, that they have enough money for other things.  

That is so far from the truth and Kayla is the perfect example. 

The last thing that worries me is that Christmas break is coming up, and knowing that Kayla often stays with friends, etc. she could use some extra money to help be self-sufficient with food purchases because she doesn't want to always have to rely on others. 

So here's what she needs: 

$200-300 to pay for the remainder of her graduate school applications (she has 4-5 left due in the next month or so...  they are $50-60 each). 

VISA gift cards or money to help pay for gas, her car insurance, and food -- at least for a couple months just to get her through this stretch where she is spending an additional $500 applying for graduate schools that she'd normally have for expenses.  Any additional money would help her pay for when she interviews at these graduate schools and making a small dent in her tuition for college, allowing her to focus more on her studies and just being a college senior, and less on figuring out where her next meal is coming from or how she's going to make a better life for herself."

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What an amazing young woman Kayla is! If you feel so inclined to help Kayla out that would be so wonderful! 

WAYS TO HELP

You can send Kayla monetary donations HERE which will go to food, gas, graduate school applications, health insurance and bills. 

There is also an Amazon Wishlist FULFILLED
for Kayla with gift cards, medication, etc. 

OTHER WAYS TO HELP

If you'd like to help Kayla out in any other way, a letter of encouragement, gift cards, etc., email me at JBHolidayPIF@gmail.com with the subject line KAYLA124

Thank you for Paying it Forward!

Pay it Forward- The Rawls

This is the Rawls Family

Location: Whiteville, NC

"When I was pregnant with my Son, who is now 19 months, I developed preeclampsia and was put on bed rest and taken out of work where I was a Medical Coder. After I had my Son I reached back out to my employer and they had filled my position without my knowledge and told me there wasn’t a job for me anymore. 

We thought it was a minor setback and looked at it as a blessing. 

That I would find another job soon, but it was the beginning of a nightmare. 

Fast forward to now and I haven’t been able to find a job that would work with a child care schedule.

My Husband is a Law Enforcement Officer (who also works his off days part time at Autozone Part Store) for the city we live in and risks his life everyday. 

They pay isn’t enough to manage a family of 3 on one income. We have gone weeks without actual food and grocery shopping. Our bills have grown into a massive pile of debt that we haven’t been able to manage.

A few months ago we made the decision to move closer to my parents and family. To have help. 

I had found a job making decent money to help match my Husband's salary, to get caught up and to make the payments on our “new house”. 

Just two months after moving in Hurricane Florence hit and our entire neighborhood flooded. 

Which has never happened. 

My husband worked 8 days straight during the storm leaving us behind. 

We had to evacuate and pray everything would be okay when we returned. We felt like a black cloud just continued to follow us around. 

That was back in September. 

We still don’t have heat/air or any repairs to our home haven’t even been started. 

Mold is in our laundry room and on some of our doors. We also lost my husbands Tahoe that we parked at my parents thinking they would be safe, but wasn’t. 

It’s been in the teens this week here in NC and I’ve had to send my Son to bed bundled up as if he was going outside.
Last month, My Husband decided the first of the year he was going to go off to truck driving school which in return would leave me basically a single mom, raising our Son and praying that he may one day be able to get a local job that would allow him to see our Son after he gets a year of experience. 

The job I got, that I mentioned happened before the Hurricane, they ended up letting me go as well. Since I got a job I had to put my Son in day care. Which made him very sick since he has only ever been home with me or family. During this time he also developed a dairy sensitivity which caused the day care to call me anytime he threw up and I would have to leave and go get him since my Husbands schedule and job demand didn’t allow him to. I have prayed endlessly that something would work out for the good, and allow me to provide for my family or my dreams of owning my own business would come true.

With every step forward came 10 steps back. I tried MLM and anything I could do on the side to help makes ends meet, but I haven’t had any success. 

I would love to give my Son the Christmas he deserves, buy him clothes that he hasn’t outgrown and a nice pair of shoes and thank my Husband for all his hard work and for his scarifies he has had to make for our family."

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WAYS TO HELP:

You can purchase items from the Rawls Family Wishlist - FULFILLED
and have it sent directly to them.

OTHER WAYS TO HELP:

Gift cards to Walmart to help with groceries and clothes will help tremendously. 

You can also send monetary donations directly to their PayPal to help pay their bills and lessen the financial burden this Christmas. 

If you'd like to send monetary donations or gifts, please email me at JBHolidayPIF@gmail.com with the subject line BRISTOL123

Thank you for Paying it Forward!

Pay it Forward- The Willhite Family

This is the Willhite Family

Location: Muskogee, OK
Nominated by: Bailey Blake 


"I would love to nominate my best friend Chelsey’s family. She was a 26 year old beautiful mother of two little boys, age 4 & 7. A wonderful wife, amazing friend, and awesome daughter. She passed away Nov. 10 2018 after a long and courageous battle with cancer. She was a faithful follower of you and she’s actually the reason I found you to follow!
Her husband was obviously the only one working the entire time she was sick. She fell sick in 2016 and battled Osteosarcoma until the end. 
She fought SO incredibly hard. Her boys deserve the world and while nothing in the world could make up for the loss of their mother or her husband's loss, all the help this Christmas I knew would be so so appreciated. 
Anything from gift cards to something in memory of Chelsey. 

The boys are 7 & 4. Their names are Keegan and Landen. 

Keegan loves nerf guns and Landen loves PJ masks. They both LOVEEEE all things sports! They are Oklahoma University fans but they love all things sports! 

Anything like grocery cards would be so so helpful also. I know they will be thankful for seriously anything to help in any area for the holidays. 

 I really really cannot thank you enough. I know Chelsey would be beyond grateful."

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I can't imagine the tough time these little boys and Chelsey's husband are having. 
I would love for us to rally behind this family and help bring a smile to those boys faces on Christmas morning!

WAYS TO HELP:

You can send gift cards to Walmart, Homeland, Target, etc.
Or gifts to Keegan and Landen including sports related items, OU fan gear, nerf guns, PJ Mask toys and anything to help with the holidays.

PLEASE SEND AN EMAIL TO JBHolidayPIF@gmail.com with the subject line CHELSEY121 with how you'd like to help and I'll get you the information you need. 

Thank you for Paying it Forward!

Pay it Forward- James Manny

This is James Manny. 

He was nominated by James's friend's mother, Holly.

Holly's daughter and James are friends. 

I know often times teenagers get overlooked at Christmas. 

Let's give this sweet young man a Christmas to remember. 

Location: Winona, MS.

"I want to nominate a young boy I know. He is 16 years old and is my daughter's friend. 
He hasn't had Christmas since his mother died when he was 13 years old. 
He also recently lost his step-father a few weeks ago to cancer. 
He lives with his grandparents and basically takes care of them, as they are not in good health themselves. He has never had much of anything and they barely have food at their house. I feed him a lot of the times when I cook for my kids. He doesn’t have much family left. 
He is trying to get into the military as soon as he is able so he can make a living for himself. 
They do not even have a tree or any decorations.
His basic needs are clothing or gift cards to get some clothing, as he owns very little. He would benefit most from a nice pair of shoes and some warm clothes. He doesn't have hardly any shoes or warm clothes. He is usually just wearing a white t-shirt every time I see him. 
I am sure he would be grateful for anything. 
He never asks for anything and tries to do everything with out asking for help. 
He is such a sweet kid and I would love to be able to see him have a Christmas again. 

Thank you so much for this wonderful pay it forward to help those in need."
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WAYS TO HELP:

Here is James's Amazon wishlist.  FULFILLED
You can purchase directly from his wishlist and it will be sent directly to Holly, to deliver to James. 

OTHER WAYS TO HELP:

If you would like to send other items like gift cards, letters of encouragement, etc., to James, please email me at JBHolidayPIF@gmail.com with the subject line JAMES1130. 

Pay it Forward- The Byrd's

This is the Byrd Family. They need some help this Christmas. Let's help make their Christmas a little brighter this year!

Location: White Oak, Tx

"I would like to nominate our three children, not myself or my husband just my children. They have endured more than I have ever expected this past year. I am going to keep it short as I am sure there are way more families that have lost loved ones and need more, however it weighed on my heart so heavy that I knew I had to at least try for our babies. 16 months ago, I quit my job (full time as a secretary) to return to nursing school to improve our income to get my husband home who has been away working for 8 years. We have 3 children - 10 year old (boy), 8 year old and 5 year old (girls), my husband has missed so much in their lives. 6 months ago he was injured in our home and we have gone without an income for the last 3 months, savings was depleted over the last year with college tuition and one income. I graduate next month with my RN and our children have suffered more than any of us. We are so close, however they have emptied their piggy banks to help us buy food (food stamps denied us because he is still "employed", they have eaten on the free lunch at school and have already told us that they know that Christmas isn't about presents so we can tell Santa that it's okay they don't wake up to presents. We asked them to write a letter to see if we could find an angel tree in our area but they know we are strapped for money so they told us they could just make gifts for each other to wake up to on Christmas morning. Many times our youngest, who does not understand, has asked for things such as a pudding or juice and our older two have told her before we could intervene "no sis we can't waste our money on things we don't need." It breaks my heart to know that our kids are having to grow up faster due to what we thought as parents was a great decision and now it's backfiring. I sat in my car the other day crying and screaming out to God and wondering why is this so hard? I have tried to donate plasma for extra cash but I am apparently anemic, I have picked up a part time job during nursing school that only allows 12 hours and our account is negative from bills so it gets eaten up every time I get paid, I just do not know why it is so hard when I am trying so hard. Of course, I would love for my kids to wake up to toys but even more important to receive clothes without holes in the knees or a special gift that they know we did not endure all of this for nothing. They are so special and they have hearts of gold. I am not asking for gifts upon gifts just a little something for each of them to show the spirit of Christmas is still alive even in a scary world. After writing this email, I realized that I am asking for gifts when actually I have 3 that have already learned the spirit of Christmas. Writing this email has actually blessed me and pulled me out of my funk. Thank you for doing this, I am moved to tears as I know so many families will be grateful for any help."

What beautiful children they have! I knew immediately we needed to help this family. 

After I contacted them and let them know they had been chosen, this is the response I got from them: 

"I am currently bawling my eyes out in the building where I attend nursing school. I just finished my final exam and walked out to this email. I have no words right now as I am speechless and so grateful. Just this morning my curly headed 8 year old was begging for a pair of matching earrings so she "could be pretty like her friends". Brandi you are helping to make her feel pretty and you do not even know it. For us, right now we are facing our electric to be disconnected but that is monetary and really the only thing I can think of besides encouragement, which is what this is by helping our kids. I haven't even thought of anything we could benefit from as our main focus has been keeping our kids from stressing. You just helped alleviate one of the biggest fears in my heart.Thank you from myself and my husband. I just read him the email and he is currently crying (a man that in 10 years I have never seen cry). We appreciate you more than you know. Thank you is not even enough."

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WAYS TO HELP:

I asked Cortney to send me a picture of their family and her response was "we don't have any of the 5 of us because we haven't had family pictures taken in years due to finances."

Perhaps a local photographer would be willing to donate a family session for them so they could get some family pictures taken? 
UPDATE- Meredith Smeltzer Photography has donated a family session to the Byrd Family!

Cortney also mentioned that she hasn't had her hair done since summer. 

We got her fixed up there!

Emily Pipak at Hair by Emily in Kilgore, Tx. is fixing Cortney up with a cut and color! 

I asked them to put together Amazon wishlists for their children. 

You can do directly here and purchase something from their wish list and have it sent directly to them!

James's Amazon Wishlist (10 yr old boy) FULFILLED

Emma's Amazon Wishlist (5 yr old girl) FULFILLED

Peyton's Amazon Wishlist (8 yr old girl) FULFILLED

OTHER WAYS TO HELP:

If you would like to send a card, letter of encouragement, make a payment to their electric company (it is facing disconnection on December 5th)-UPDATE THEIR ELECTRIC BILL HAS BEEN PAID! THANK YOU!,  please email me at 

JBHolidayPIF@gmail with the subject line: CORTNEY1129 

with what you are wanting to send/help out with.

UPDATE: Their electric bill has been paid off, but if you would still like to send something other than filling their children's wishlists (top priority), please send an email. 

Thank you for helping Pay it Forward!!

Holiday Pay it Forward 2018

In 2012/2013 I was writing my blog daily and documenting my 60 lb. weight loss, running journey and new mama journey.
I had a good amount of people reading my blog and I wanted to do SOMETHING to help less fortunate people during the holidays.
Pay it Forward was born.

I had my readers submit stories of families they knew of in need. Families who were good people but had fallen on tough times.
The amount of people nominated was overwhelming. I spent the entire month of December reading through heart wrenching families, trying to decide who's to feature.
It was hard. But more than anything, it humbled me and stirred something so deep inside me that I didn't know was there.

I wanted to use my platform for good. I wanted to #bethebridge and connect these people who NEEDED help, with people who COULD HELP!

So I posted their stories on my blog with ways to help and what happened next was a Christmas miracle.
My readers rallied together and sent these families PILES of gifts for their kids, gift cards to buy groceries, clothes to people who had lost everything in hurricanes and fires, paid off medical bills for complete strangers, bought entire Christmases for inner city classrooms, donated any and everything they could, sent cards and letters just saying they were praying for them in their time of need.
Many families didn't even know they had been nominated and would come home to mound of gifts, piles of gift cards and letters and just BLESSINGS.

It filled my heart with so much joy, that I've wanted to do it ever since.

The thing is, it's a lot to take on. It's a lot of behind the scenes and organizing work that I just didn't know HOW to do.
I still don't really know HOW.
I just know I HAVE TO.

Over the past 5 years since doing the Pay it Forward a lot has happened in my own personal life.
I've gotten divorced, started my life over from ground zero, had my 3rd child, gotten remarried and built a life I am proud of.
I am truly blessed and I feel like it's the right time to bring back the Pay it Forward Movement.
I call this a movement because thats exactly what it is.

I'm just creating the bridge to connect these people who can help with those that TRULY NEED IT.

HERE'S THE PLAN:
I will choose 20 families to feature on this blog from December 1st-December 20th.
I will post their story on my blog (right here) and will then give y'all call to action steps. Most likely it will be in the form of an Amazon wish list, etc.

You can then read through the stories and if you feel so inclined, send anything that family needs directly to them.
I will let you know how you can help the families nominated and what all they need.
Even prayers, cards and letters of encouragement and kind words would be AMAZING!

HOW TO NOMINATE A FAMILY:
I have received over 100 entries already. Please know this process takes awhile to sort through.
I do have some awesome friends helping me out!
But if you would like to nominate a family, you can send a SHORT email (please keep them short, as reading through them takes a lot of time!) with who you are nominating and why to
JBHolidayPIF@gmail.com
Pictures of the family would be great.

IF YOU WANT TO HELP:
Read the stories and donate!
Share the blog, share my Instagram (@justbrandi_) , share the stories!
Another way you can help is to spread the word. The connections we can make go far beyond my reach!

Thank you all for being part of such an amazing movement! It blew me away with the amount of kindness I saw last time, and I just know it will again!!! I can't thank you all enough!

Here is one of the AMAZING things we were able to pull together and accomplish 5 & 6 years ago:

Please direct any questions to JBHolidayPIF@gmail.com

How I Got My Baby Sleeping 8 Hours by 5 Weeks Old

*This is not a sponsored post. All opinions are my own. 

Affiliate links included.

I thought once I had Trace I was going to forget all the essential baby stuff.

How did I get my older boys to sleep through the night almost 7 and 9 years ago??

Back then, I read a book (that wasn't NEARLY as controversial as it is now) called BabyWise.

I lived by that book! I took the eat, wake, sleep schedule they had and implemented it with the boys and they were both sleeping 8 hours by 7 and 8 weeks old.

So with Trace, I went back to that book. It was what I knew.

But I kept seeing all these people talking about this course called Taking Cara Babies that they were raving about. (code Brandi gets you 10% off)

I didn't need that. I was a BabyWise mom and I intended to do the same for Trace.

Then Cara reached out to me and wanted to gift me her newborn course (before Trace was even born). I looked into her blog and read what she had to say and was loving all the information I was getting, so I accepted.

I didn't take the course until I was in labor with Trace. They are in video form in small clips, like 10-15 minutes at most. 

So I watched the videos in between my contractions.

When Trace was born, I immediately started to implement her tips as best as you can with a newborn, very loosely. 

But when he turned 4 weeks old I was able to really start the course. 

It took a week of consistency and he was sleeping 8 hours at night. 

This is without interruptions, without waking up to feed at night, without waking up with a dirty diaper. I'm talking 8 solid hours of peaceful sleep.

So what did I do??

I followed Cara's tips, and I stuck with a regimented ROUTINE.

I am a BIG BELIEVER that routine trumps all.

I give him a bath every night. No, he's not dirty every night, he's a baby, but it's part of our routine.

Bath. - I stretch this out as long as possible. 

Lotion. - we talk and play and I rub his lotion on and get him in his pjs.

Bottle. - last bottle of the day I will get him to eat 6-8 ounces.

Rock. - I was adamant on still being able to rock my babies. I love it and I'll never give it up. I rock him until he's sleepy, then I put him in his crib, drowsy, in his Merlins Sleep Suit.

A few things to note:

-Trace has been bottle fed since day 1. I did not breastfeed at all. 

-He was swaddled at night until 10 weeks old, when we switched to the Merlin's Magic Sleep Suit.

-His room is DARK. We have blackout curtains that help a ton!

-He is my 3rd baby so things are much more laid back- I know every sound isn't cause for alarm, I'm not worried about every little thing, etc. I am much more relaxed with him than I was with my older two. I think there's a lot of factors that go into that as well. Age being a big one. :)

Here is what our typical schedule looks like at 3 months old:

8:30am Trace wakes up. He's been sleeping all night in his crib, upstairs in his room.

8:30am Trace eats 6-8 ounces. 

8:40-10:00am we play. Tummy time, Fisher Price Sit me Up seat, etc.

10:00am Trace is sleepy. I rock him, in his room, in the dark. 

10:00am-1:00pm Trace naps. (I usually work/workout)

1:00pm- Trace wakes up and eats. 

1:00-3:00pm we play. Tummy time, Fisher Price Sit Me Up seat, etc.

3:00pm-5:00pm Trace naps. (last nap of the day)

5:00pm he eats. We have lots of play time. 

7:30pm bathtime. I stretch this out as long as possible. Playing in the tub, splashing, etc.

8:00pm lotion, pjs routine.

8:30pm he eats. Rock and bedtime. 

I am a big believer in keeping a consistent routine. 

I also highly recommend sleep training ASAP. 

If you decide to try out Taking Cara Babies, use this link for 10% off!

I HIGHLY recommend TCB over Baby Wise. I would have done TCB if I knew about it with my older boys. 

Plus, it's in video form which helps with examples, etc. She shows you examples and visuals, versus with Baby Wise it's just a book. The video examples really help!

And here are a few of my favorite baby items. With my 3rd I really decluttered. I had no baby things from my older two, as we got rid of everything, so I had to start over completely. 

I also know that it's just STUFF. You'll have your few key items that you LOVE, but there's not a huge need for all the little stuff. 

Feeding:

Baby Brezza -worth it's weight in gold. We've formula fed from day one and this has been a LIFESAVER! It's like a Keurig for formula!

Tommee Tippee bottles

Baby Gear:

Rock n Play- he slept in this for the first 3 weeks of his life, before we switched him to the crib. He liked this over any other swing.

Britax B Safe Stroller/Car Seat

Angel Care Bath Seat

Ubbi Diaper Pail- doesn't need special trash bags!

Infantino Carrier

Infant Optics Baby Monitor

Fisher Price Sit Me Up Seat

Nursery Door Silencer

Boppy Lounger

Sleeping:

Blackout curtains

Halo Sleep Sack Swaddle

Sheep White Noise/Sound Machine

Merlin's Magic Sleep Suit

Trace's Birth Story

My dr. decided to induce me at 39 weeks.

I'd never been induced before, but I have to admit, having a schedule set made me feel at ease. 

I had visions of this baby being born in the car on the way to the hospital. I heard those 3rd babies come FAST! 

So I was relieved to hear induction.

We went in to the hospital on Wednesday, April 18th at 11pm.

We got settled into a room and around 12:30am they came in to check me and get my IV of fluids started, etc.

When they checked me I was still at 2cm and not effaced.

This is when they placed the first round of Cytotec, a medication placed on your cervix to help it dilate.

A few hours go by with little to no contractions, so a second dose of Cytotec was placed at 4:00am.

At this time I was still at 2cm dilated and now 80% effaced.

After the second dose of Cytotec, the contractions began to pick up pretty fiercely.

The nurse came in and told me that my platelets were low (this is something I've known for my entire pregnancy as my dr. was monitoring it) and that they needed to redraw my blood to double check. If it came back low again, I wouldn't be able to have an epidural.

Ummm... excuse me??

No epidural?

I looked at the nurse and said "I want you to know I am going to have a heart attack if I can't get an epidural."

They redrew my blood and I had a mini melt down. My boyfriend assured me everything was going 

to be ok. 

About this time my dr. comes in to check on me and the anesthesiologist comes in to talk about the risks of proceeding with the epidural with low platelets. 

The anesthesiologist said my platelets were indeed low, but that if I understood the risks (mainly of bleeding and not being able to clot), that he could place the epidural whenever I was ready.

I said okay, sent him on his merry way and continued to deal with contractions without it.

My dr. checked me at 9:40am and I was dilated to 4cm and 90% effaced. 

She then broke my water.

That's when the contractions really began to pick up.

I told the nurse at 10:00am that I was ready for the epidural.

I was dilated to a 5.

The anesthesiologist came back in at 10:30am and placed the epidural. 

No matter how many times I've done that, (all three kids btw) it's still the strangest feeling, having a tube fed through your back via a needle.

This is when things got a little crazy.

Trace did not respond well to the epidural. 

His heart rate would drop significantly with every contraction I was having. 

Multiple nurses rushed in and began to flip me from side to side to try and see what was causing him distress. 

Next thing I know they were putting an oxygen mask on me and calling my dr. 

At 11:30am my dr. came in and checked me. I was at 8cm.

She then brought out the peanut ball (a large ball placed between your legs to help open your pelvis) and I laid in bed with the oxygen mask on for about 30 minutes.

At 12:00pm my dr. came back in and the end of the bed came off, the stirrups came up, and I was instructed to push.

I pushed for 1 minute, a total of 3 contractions, and at 12:03pm Trace was born weighing in at 6 lbs. 13 oz.

When he came out, he did not cry. My dr. held him and tried to get him to cry for what seemed like forever. It was almost a full minute before a tiny whimper came out. 

He was placed on my chest and that feeling of complete and utter euphoria rushed over me. 

Tears were falling from my eyes uncontrollably as my boyfriend and I stared at this perfect tiny human that we did not plan, but all of a sudden fell so in love with, together.

That's the thing about life, you can plan for it all you want, but it rarely, if ever, goes that way.
And we are so very grateful for that. <3 

Induction Talk

My dr. told me we have an induction date set at my last appointment!
I've never been induced before, my body has naturally gone into labor 3 and 4 days before my due date with the boys.

However, with Trace, I've had to be monitored more closely and his growth is the main concern.
First, it was my dying placenta, now my fundal height has been measuring small the past few weeks, so we have a sonogram on Tuesday, April 10th to do a bio physical profile to determine how big all the things are.
Check my amniotic fluid, measure his growth, see my placenta again, etc.

Good news is that movement hasn't decreased at all, he is still so dang squirmy.
I swear, he's more wiggly than the boys were, at least from what I remember.

I talk to my man a lot about how this pregnancy makes me feel, etc.
He's asked if it's been different because this baby wasn't planned, how I've felt in comparison to the last two, etc.

Honestly, even though he wasn't planned, it doesn't make me any less excited for him!
I kind of feel a bit MORE excited for this baby, just based on my life circumstances.
With both the boys I worried about EVERYTHING, I was stressed out about going back to work, money, and so much more.
That pressure has been lifted AND I'll have 2 little helpers this time! So all in all, I feel more relaxed.

Aside from being monitored more closely this time, this pregnancy has been the easiest on my body.
I truly believe that's because I've been so active for so many years.
Hopefully it will be the easiest postpartum, too.

At my 37 week appointment I was only dilated to 1 cm and not effaced at all.

So if everything looks good on the sonogram on Tuesday, I will go another week and get induced on the 19th.
My dr. says there is no need to push it any further than that and I 100% trust her decision.

Regardless, baby boy will be here VERY SOON!
We can't wait to meet him!

Pregnancy Update- Nearly 35 Weeks

I can't believe I'm having another baby in a few weeks.
I mean, I know I am, I feel him move every day, I see my body changing, but I feel like I was just getting used to our new normal.
Me, my man, the boys.

Life is funny.

Pregnancy wise, things are different this time around.
Trace (our nickname for the baby- NOT his name) is giving us a little trouble these last few weeks.

At my last dr. appointment my dr. noticed from an ultrasound that my placenta was calcifying quicker than normal.
There is no known causes of this, and sometimes it just happens.
So she put me on weekly non stress tests to monitor Trace and make sure he is still active and growing at a healthy rate.
I get hooked up to monitors weekly to check his heart rate and movements.
My fundal height hadn't grown in 2 weeks, which could be due to the fact that his positioning is off (he's not head down), so my dr. said that if it hadn't changed this week that she wanted to do a sonogram to check on things.

Neither of the boys were ever not head down, so this is all new to me.

I'm anxious to see how all this pans out over the next few weeks.

I do not have everything in order and ready for baby, but I am not freaking out about it.
My stress levels are at an all time low with this pregnancy.
Not having to worry about going back to work, how to afford daycare, now worrying about breastfeeding, etc. has really helped this time around.
That and my man is very laid back with everything, so it rubs off on me.
He's so even keel and calm about everything, it's one of my favorite traits of his.

As for me, I feel pregnant.
I am feeling a little more pressure now, but all in all still good.
I'm working out 4-5 times a week. Spinning mostly. Lifting minimally, but walking lots.
I have gained 32 lbs. so far with 5 weeks to go.
With the boys, I lost weight the last few weeks, so I'm betting it will be much of the same this go round.
I'm not worried about the weight.

I think this go round without breastfeeding (due to my full breast lift in 2015 with anchor incision) the weight thing will be much different.
I tried to lose weight immediately after having Mushy and I was breastfeeding at the time and didn't know how the hell to do that.
I'm one of those people who DON'T lose weight while breastfeeding.

I will also be cleaning up my diet immediately after having Trace so I think things will go a bit differently this time with losing the baby weight.
I want to say I think it will be easier to lose the weight, at least that's kind of what I'm expecting.
We'll see.
I just know more now than I did back then. I also have one hell of a support system. This is what my man does for a living, so having him there to help me will be amazing!

Not much longer now!
I should probably pack my hospital bag...

35 weeks

Pregnancies and weight loss

Yesterday I was looking back at my posts from when I was pregnant with Mushy and Big T.
If you don't know my story, I was 50 lbs. overweight BEFORE I got pregnant with my first, Big T, in 2009.
I started pre-pregnancy at 185 lbs. At 5'6, that was about 50 lbs. more than my "normal".
I was newly married and had just steadily put on about 10 lbs. a year. A healthy lifestyle wasn't something I was ever taught. It's not ever something I had to worry about. I was a very active kid and played competitive sports for a very long time. So my diet consisted of fast food, fried chicken, sweet tea, and pretty much anything I wanted.
I never gained weight because I was so active. I practiced 2 hours a day, sometimes more, and softball and volleyball were my life.

Oh, if I'd have known THEN what I know NOW. I would have dialed in my nutrition, I would have fed my body to PERFORM, and not just to survive.
But I feel like a healthy lifestyle wasn't a big thing back then. No one I knew really did anything any differently than I did.
A bag of chips and a Coke for lunch was normal.

So it's no wonder that I had weight issues the older and less active I became.

When I had Big T I weighed 220 lbs.
And I felt EVERY BIT OF IT.
It's not that I gained a lot during my pregnancy, 35 lbs. is still considered normal, but I was 50 lbs. overweight to begin with.
Everything hurt.
I hit the miserable mark at 25 weeks.
I still wasn't accustomed to a healthy lifestyle at that point.

32 weeks with Big T- 2009

I didn't workout, I didn't eat healthy, none of that was on my radar yet.

So after I had him, I decided I needed to lose 60 lbs.
198 lbs. was my starting point.
And there's a very long, detailed story that went into that weight loss, but I did it in 11 months.
I posted progress pictures on my old blog with every 10 lbs. I lost.

198 lbs. - post baby #1 - 2009

138 lbs. - post baby #1 - 2010 (11 months later)

198 lbs. - post baby #1 - 2009

138 lbs. - post baby #1 - 2010

Health was now a part of my life.
That weight loss was what catapulted my life to the next chapter. It changed absolutely EVERYTHING for me.
It opened up a new career path, deep seeded issues in my marriage, my goals, dreams, EVERYTHING.
Some of it good, some of it the scariest thing I've ever been through, but ALL OF IT, lead to the most amazing things.

In 2011 my HATT (Husband At The Time) and I decided that we were ready to have baby #2.

This pregnancy was MUCH better than my first.
I gained 32 lbs. with him and I stayed active with him throughout the duration of my pregnancy.

Now, my "active" THEN, ISN'T my "active" now.
Let me say this, as with EVERYTHING, weight loss is a PROCESS. Fitness is a PROCESS.
It takes TIME to get into these things, and it certainly took time for me as well.
My "active" with my pregnancy #2 was running/jogging a few times a week.
It's pretty much all I did.
And HEY, it was great! That's just where I was at that time in 2011.
I didn't lift weights, I didn't take spin classes, I didn't do anything but what I could afford, which was pretty much nothing but running.
I was also brand new to a healthy lifestyle, so my version of "healthy" eating was also very different.
It was BETTER than before, but it wasn't what I'd eat NOW, after having lived a healthy lifestyle for 8+ years and gaining the knowledge I have now (which I'm sure will be even more so in the next 8 years!)

I hope that makes sense.

I did the best I could with the knowledge and funds I had at that time.

Baby #2 - 2011

After I had Mushy, I began the weight loss process again. This time was much more manageable. I felt like I'd just been through it, and losing the 30 lbs. I needed wasn't too intimidating.

Post baby #2 - 2011 - 171 lbs.

Post baby #2 -2012- 140 lbs. 

Post baby #2 - 2011 - 171 lbs. 

Post baby #2 - 2012- 140 lbs. 

After I lost the baby weight with Mushy, I began to get into other things like weight lifting and spinning.

In 2014 I got divorced, moved in with my parents with the boys and competed in my first bikini competition.

That was a very difficult time in my life.
I was being scrutinized more than I ever had, I was being judged, literally, and I was trying to figure out who the hell I was.
I searched for happiness in a pant size, which I was in a size 2 by the way, the smallest I'd EVER been.
EVER.

One thing I learned from that experience, was a love for the sport. I learned that there's a give and take. I learned that without a support system, it will BREAK YOU DOWN.
I learned that who you surround yourself with is so incredibly vital, something I had been blind to in the past.
But most importantly, I learned how freaking strong I was.
Not physically, but MENTALLY.
I'd never been beaten down so much in my life. And the way I collected myself after that and vowed to move on and NEVER take that again, is something I'm so very proud of.

I started my life completely over.

I found a happy medium.
A place where macros don't control me and I workout to FEEL GOOD.
A place where a number on a scale didn't make or break my mood.

2015 - around 140-145 lbs. Not weighing myself regularly.

I lived in that place for a long time- happy.
I'm STILL happy.

I'm just growing another human and happy. :)

This pregnancy has been the easiest of the 3, thus far.
I have stayed extremely active and eaten pretty healthy.
Both very relative terms, by the way.
But I am spinning 4-5 times a week, lifting 2-3 times a week, and getting in walks and runs still.
I have gained 24 lbs. thus far and I have 9 weeks left.

I have not gotten remarried yet, but that is in our plans.
This baby was a surprise, but it doesn't make us any less grateful for him.
We didn't want to take away the fun and excitement of a wedding just because we got pregnant.
So we are taking things one big life step at a time. :)
First was to purchase our own home.
My DREAM since getting divorced. We did that in November of 2017.

I am just plugging along with this pregnancy and am so incredibly excited to meet this little man and see the boys with him.

30 weeks with baby #3

I will definitely be sharing my post baby #3 weight loss on the blog after he is born. :)
And this time will be a liiiiittle different, so stay tuned!
It's going to be AWESOME.... .and very humbling I'm sure. :)